Based on interviews with Sarah Edwards, DO and Mutiat Onigbanjo, MD.
Childhood today looks very different from what many parents remember. Children and teens now spend seven to ten hours a day on screens, not including schoolwork. For many, social media is where they talk to friends, learn new things and stay entertained.
Experts in behavioral health and pediatrics at the University of Maryland Medical Center — Sarah Edwards, DO, associate professor of psychiatry and Mutiat Onigbanjo, MD, assistant professor of pediatrics at the University of Maryland School of Medicine — see the effects of this every day. They note that while social media can offer fun and connection, it also brings new challenges for mental health and healthy development.
In this blog, Dr. Edwards and Dr. Onigbanjo explain what parents should watch for and how to help kids build healthier digital habits.
How Social Media Is Changing Childhood
When kids spend so much time online, they may miss out on important parts of growing up. Time that used to be spent playing outside, being active or hanging out with friends face-to-face is now often replaced by sitting and scrolling. This shift matters even more for preteens and teens, who naturally care a lot about how others see them. Social media can intensify that pressure by providing constant, public feedback through likes and comments. For some kids, this can lead to more stress, anxiety or self-doubt — especially if they start relying on online approval to feel good about themselves.
Early Signs Parents Should Watch For
Kids don’t always speak up when something is wrong online, so changes in behavior can be important clues. Trouble focusing, staying up too late on devices or becoming more forgetful can be early physical signs that social media may be affecting them. Emotionally, some children may seem more irritable or anxious after being online, or they may withdraw from family and lose interest in activities they used to enjoy.
Parents should also notice shifts in self-esteem. Kids might become overly focused on likes and comments or feel discouraged when posts don’t get much attention. Sudden secrecy about online activity, or quickly deleting and recreating accounts, may hint at bullying or conflict. If these signs continue or start to affect schoolwork, friendships or daily routines, it may be time to look more closely at what’s happening online.
What Pediatricians Look For During Checkups
During yearly checkups, pediatricians now ask more detailed questions about social media — not just how long kids are using it, but how it makes them feel. Dr. BanjoOnibanjo explains that she looks for whether online time is replacing healthy, in-person activities or whether certain platforms seem to be causing stress. Pediatricians also try to understand what kinds of interactions children are having online. Are they positive and supportive, or are they leaving the child more anxious or upset? Parents can use these same questions at home to get a better sense of their child’s digital life.
How Parents Can Take Action
1. Set Clear Expectations for Screen Use
Having simple, consistent rules can help kids build healthy habits. Many families find it helpful to keep phones out of bedrooms at night, set clear homework times and encourage outdoor or screen-free breaks during the day. These boundaries don’t have to feel like punishment — they simply give kids routines that support their wellbeing.
2. Keep Conversations Open
Talking openly about social media can make it easier for kids to share when something goes wrong. Ask questions in a calm, curious way, like what they enjoy online or if anything lately has made them uncomfortable. The goal is to understand their experience, not to criticize it. When kids feel safe having these conversations, they’re more likely to come to you for help.
3. Focus on Patterns, Not Just Hours
Instead of only focusing on the number of hours spent online, notice how your child seems afterward. Do they appear calm and happy, or stressed and irritable? Their emotional response often gives better insight into how social media is affecting them than screen time alone.
4. Encourage Real-World Activities
Kids need a balance of online and offline experiences. Sports, clubs, hobbies and time with friends in person help them build confidence and social skills. These real-world connections can protect their mental health and give them a break from online pressure.
5. Address Bullying or Negative Experiences Early
If your child is dealing with bullying or a negative online experience, let them know they won’t get in trouble for telling you. Save screenshots, keep messages and reach out to the school if needed. You can also ask a pediatrician or mental health provider for guidance. The important thing is addressing issues early before they grow.
6. Model Health Digital Habits
Kids learn from what adults do. Putting your phone away during meals, taking breaks from screens or showing how you balance device use can have a big impact. When parents model healthy behavior, kids are more likely to follow.
When to Seek Professional Help
Parents should reach out for help if mood changes, stress or anxiety last for more than a few weeks, or if social media begins to affect sleep, school or daily functioning. If your child becomes withdrawn, overwhelmed or clearly upset by online interactions, a pediatrician or mental health professional can help guide the next steps. Getting support early can make a real difference.
The Bottom Line
Social media is a major part of modern childhood, but with awareness and open communication, parents can guide their kids toward healthier digital habits. By paying attention to emotional cues, setting clear boundaries, and staying involved in their online world, families can help children thrive both online and offline.
Learn about Child and Adolescent Psychiatry at University of Maryland Medical Center.